Wednesday, July 2, 2008

An Open Letter to the Guy Sitting at the Next Table Over During Lunch

Dear Sir,

I couldn't help but overhear your conversation with your lunch companion yesterday. I could go on a long spiel about your crazy ramblings, but instead I'll keep it short and sweet.

Your xenophobic and racist rants are just one more reason I hope Senator Obama wins in November. I can't imagine how much trouble it will cause you to see Obama in the White House, but I'm sure it will be plenty.

I hope devoted Muslims move to your neighborhood. Heck, I hope your grandchildren marry a damn dirty "furner", just to piss you off. Change is the one constant in this world, and it is better to embrace it, rather than stick your feet in the mud and come off as some small-minded, hateful asshole.

Fundamentalist Islam is not going to topple the United States. The death of democracy in the United States, if it ever comes, will not be done by non-Christians, illegal immigrants, or them damn dirty Red Commie Pinkos. It will come about holding the Bible in its right hand, a stock report in its left hand, and the American flag draped around its neck. Its friend will be Xenophobia and Ignorance, and will mislead the justified desire for protecting heritage and tradition to betray its innocence and purity.

A change is gonna come, good sir, and I suggest you should learn to accept that. It will make your life much more enjoyable.

Best Wishes,

Andrew C. Tate

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